Chapter 8 is long, however it does not say very much beyond what has already been said in previous chapters. It starts of with the direct statement, “The essence of a man is Strength. A man is meant to be the incarnation – our experience in human form – of a warrior God. A God who comes through for us.” (128, emphasis theirs) The authors then quote Isaiah 63:1 which reads “Who is this coming from Edom, from Borzah, with his garments stained crimson? Who is this, robed in splendor, striding forward in the greatness of his strength? “It is I, speaking in righteousness, might to save.”” There is absolutely no indication whatsoever in that verse (or any verse) to say that God’s strength is only meant to be transmitted through the male gender. This verse in Isaiah is speaking about God not man. And seeing as all humans are made in God’s image, and this particular image is one of strength, then all humans inhabit strength – male and female. There is nothing in the Bible which says a man’s purpose and meaning is to be strength.
The authors continue, speaking from a female viewpoint in saying, “We long for the protection masculine strength offers. To have them shield us from physical harm, yes. But also to have them shield us from emotional harm and spiritual attack. To intercede for us in a relationship which has become hurtful.” (129) There is nothing masculine about this kind of strength. Women are perfectly capable of providing physical protection (while generally women are not as physically strong as men, they can still be strong) as well as protection from emotional and spiritual attacks. The authors have previously talked about the “fierceness” of a woman in the ways she will stand up for her children, her friends and her family – and this is true. There is nothing about a woman that makes her inferior in providing emotional and spiritual protection. The authors appear to disagree as they continue by saying, “As women we long for someone strong to stand between us and the vicious assaults of our Enemy.” (129) On what do they base their assumption that men more are equipped to stand up to these assaults? Where is that in the Bible? Why are men forced to stand up for their women AND themselves with no help?
Stasi writes about a time John “began to take his authority over me as my husband.” (129) This statement represents common misconception that husbands have authority over their wives. If one were to carefully read the Bible, they would find only one time in which the word authority is used to refer to the relationship between a husband and wife. That occurs in 1 Corinthians 7:4, where it reads as follows: “The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.” Notice that mutual authority is granted here, so while the husband does have authority over his wife’s body, the wife likewise has authority over her husband’s body. There is no mention of the husband controlling or being stronger, simply a call for mutual submission and authority.
After providing this lengthy and stigmatizing account of men, the authors change gears and report, “The essence of a woman is Beauty. She is meant to be the incarnation – our experience in human form – of a Captivating God. A God who invites us.” (130 emphasis theirs) They then quote Isaiah 55:1-2 (I have italicized the words they left out of their quotation, “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend your money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare” They also quote Song of Solomon 4:9 and 4:15, (again I have italicized what they left out of their quotation in the book) “You have stolen my heart, my sister, by bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume than any spice!” “You are a garden fountain, a well of flowing water streaming down from Lebanon” As with their attempts to “prove” that men=strength, the authors have failed to find any scriptural support for their belief that women are meant to be beautiful and meant to soley represent the beauty of God. They rely on verses written by a man to his love, and presume that all women must be the same. They are also making a dangerous mistake in looking at women and taking that information and forming God in her image rather than the other way around. Every human is made in God’s image. God is not in the business of only sharing half of himself with each gender. How would he be benefited by limiting himself like that?
The authors spend the rest of the chapter talking about the beauty of a woman. They write, “God has given this Beauty to Eve, to every woman. Beauty is core to a woman - who she is and what she longs to be – and one of the most glorious ways we bear the imagine of God in a broken and ugly world….Women want to impact their world for good. As corulers with Adam, we are created to do so, and one of the key ways we influence our world is in making it a more beautiful place to live. We decorate our homes. We put flowers on the table, Pioneer women brought china teacups into the wilderness, and I bring a pretty tablecloth to eat on when my family camps. We wear perfume, paint our toenails, color our hair, and pierce our ears, all in an effort to be even more beautiful.” (132) I find this whole passage to be ridiculous and stigmatizing. Yes, women do bear the image of our beautiful God – but so do men. The authors describe ways in which they have witnessed women sharing beauty – through decorating and surface level beauty. What about in other cultures, where mere survival takes the place of pretty table clothes and hair color? Do you think that Mary, the mother of Jesus, stopped to clean and decorate the stable in which she gave birth to Jesus? There are so many more ways that women can bring good into the world than merely through physical beauty, the authors are painfully limiting women in refusing to open their mind beyond our culture’s stereotypes and gender myths.
On page 133 the authors describe a woman they talk about at length in regard to her beauty, “Her hair was long, swept up loosely and held by decorative combs. She wore unique, dangly earrings and pretty flowing skirts.” Seriously, can they possibly stereotype any more? Statements like this are passive in the way they create shame and confusion for a woman who doesn’t want to wear her hair long, who doesn’t have the earrings and the flowing skirt that the authors use to explain how beautiful this woman is. The authors do speak beyond her physical beauty – but they mention it first.
The authors speak at length about the need for a woman to be quiet, drawing on 1 Peter 3:3-4 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.” And a single line in Zepheniah 3:17 which says “He will quiet you with his love”. Luckily they do point out they are not calling women to never speak, but are encouraging a quiet and gentle spirit, embodying peace. They put much stock in these verses, which do not support what they are writing. The passage in 1 Peter, when looked at in context, is full of cultural details which are no longer followed today, but the authors do not acknowledge this may be true of the verses they quote as well. The two verses using the word “quiet” are not using them in the same way, nor are they relating “quiet” with “beauty” as the authors do. All in all, the authors appear to be telling women to “rest, don’t strive”, but is that really beauty, or is it peace? Is it really feminine, or is being comfortable and at rest something that is across the genders?
The authors continue, speaking from a female viewpoint in saying, “We long for the protection masculine strength offers. To have them shield us from physical harm, yes. But also to have them shield us from emotional harm and spiritual attack. To intercede for us in a relationship which has become hurtful.” (129) There is nothing masculine about this kind of strength. Women are perfectly capable of providing physical protection (while generally women are not as physically strong as men, they can still be strong) as well as protection from emotional and spiritual attacks. The authors have previously talked about the “fierceness” of a woman in the ways she will stand up for her children, her friends and her family – and this is true. There is nothing about a woman that makes her inferior in providing emotional and spiritual protection. The authors appear to disagree as they continue by saying, “As women we long for someone strong to stand between us and the vicious assaults of our Enemy.” (129) On what do they base their assumption that men more are equipped to stand up to these assaults? Where is that in the Bible? Why are men forced to stand up for their women AND themselves with no help?
Stasi writes about a time John “began to take his authority over me as my husband.” (129) This statement represents common misconception that husbands have authority over their wives. If one were to carefully read the Bible, they would find only one time in which the word authority is used to refer to the relationship between a husband and wife. That occurs in 1 Corinthians 7:4, where it reads as follows: “The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.” Notice that mutual authority is granted here, so while the husband does have authority over his wife’s body, the wife likewise has authority over her husband’s body. There is no mention of the husband controlling or being stronger, simply a call for mutual submission and authority.
After providing this lengthy and stigmatizing account of men, the authors change gears and report, “The essence of a woman is Beauty. She is meant to be the incarnation – our experience in human form – of a Captivating God. A God who invites us.” (130 emphasis theirs) They then quote Isaiah 55:1-2 (I have italicized the words they left out of their quotation, “Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend your money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare” They also quote Song of Solomon 4:9 and 4:15, (again I have italicized what they left out of their quotation in the book) “You have stolen my heart, my sister, by bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How much more pleasing is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your perfume than any spice!” “You are a garden fountain, a well of flowing water streaming down from Lebanon” As with their attempts to “prove” that men=strength, the authors have failed to find any scriptural support for their belief that women are meant to be beautiful and meant to soley represent the beauty of God. They rely on verses written by a man to his love, and presume that all women must be the same. They are also making a dangerous mistake in looking at women and taking that information and forming God in her image rather than the other way around. Every human is made in God’s image. God is not in the business of only sharing half of himself with each gender. How would he be benefited by limiting himself like that?
The authors spend the rest of the chapter talking about the beauty of a woman. They write, “God has given this Beauty to Eve, to every woman. Beauty is core to a woman - who she is and what she longs to be – and one of the most glorious ways we bear the imagine of God in a broken and ugly world….Women want to impact their world for good. As corulers with Adam, we are created to do so, and one of the key ways we influence our world is in making it a more beautiful place to live. We decorate our homes. We put flowers on the table, Pioneer women brought china teacups into the wilderness, and I bring a pretty tablecloth to eat on when my family camps. We wear perfume, paint our toenails, color our hair, and pierce our ears, all in an effort to be even more beautiful.” (132) I find this whole passage to be ridiculous and stigmatizing. Yes, women do bear the image of our beautiful God – but so do men. The authors describe ways in which they have witnessed women sharing beauty – through decorating and surface level beauty. What about in other cultures, where mere survival takes the place of pretty table clothes and hair color? Do you think that Mary, the mother of Jesus, stopped to clean and decorate the stable in which she gave birth to Jesus? There are so many more ways that women can bring good into the world than merely through physical beauty, the authors are painfully limiting women in refusing to open their mind beyond our culture’s stereotypes and gender myths.
On page 133 the authors describe a woman they talk about at length in regard to her beauty, “Her hair was long, swept up loosely and held by decorative combs. She wore unique, dangly earrings and pretty flowing skirts.” Seriously, can they possibly stereotype any more? Statements like this are passive in the way they create shame and confusion for a woman who doesn’t want to wear her hair long, who doesn’t have the earrings and the flowing skirt that the authors use to explain how beautiful this woman is. The authors do speak beyond her physical beauty – but they mention it first.
The authors speak at length about the need for a woman to be quiet, drawing on 1 Peter 3:3-4 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.” And a single line in Zepheniah 3:17 which says “He will quiet you with his love”. Luckily they do point out they are not calling women to never speak, but are encouraging a quiet and gentle spirit, embodying peace. They put much stock in these verses, which do not support what they are writing. The passage in 1 Peter, when looked at in context, is full of cultural details which are no longer followed today, but the authors do not acknowledge this may be true of the verses they quote as well. The two verses using the word “quiet” are not using them in the same way, nor are they relating “quiet” with “beauty” as the authors do. All in all, the authors appear to be telling women to “rest, don’t strive”, but is that really beauty, or is it peace? Is it really feminine, or is being comfortable and at rest something that is across the genders?
As they have done and will continue to do, the authors assume that our gender is more important than our belonging to the human race. They instruct their readers to “Ask Jesus to show you your beauty. Ask him what he thinks of you as a woman.”(135, emphasis theirs)Why can’t I just be a human being?
The authors write an interesting statement in a section under the subtitle of “Offering Beauty” when they say, “Have you noticed in reading the Gospels that people enjoyed being around Jesus? They wanted to be near him – to share a meal, take a walk, have a lingering conversation. It was the gift of his presence. When you were with him, you felt he was offering you his heart. When we offer our unguarded presence, we live like Jesus. And we invite others to do the same.” (138) First of all, Jesus was a man, so why is it that only women are being instructed to follow after this trait of his? How can a man have a feminine characteristic such as beauty? Second of all, how do the authors know how it felt to be in the presence of Jesus? And what do they make of all the people who wanted to and DID kill him? There are plenty of men who invite others to know Jesus, especially considering the fact that very few churches allow women to be pastors or leaders, so be default it is almost solely the men who act in inviting others to know Jesus. Does that mean they are feminine? Are they denying their masculine nature?
The authors write about the risk of a man offering his strength in saying “a man’s basic sin is his choice to offer strength only in those situations where he knows things will go well” (140) and they say the same of a woman offering her beauty. Where do they get this belief? Where in the Bible does it talk of this sin? If it is so common (and in other places they label it as the greatest sin), why does the Bible neglect to mention it??
Towards the end of the chapter the authors write, “As we gaze on Jesus, as we behold his goodness, his glory, we are changed into his likeness, the most beautiful Person of all. “They looked to him and were radiant.” Ps 34:5”” (146) Once again, Jesus was a man, how can he be beautiful? And that verse is descriptive of a certain situation, not prescriptive of all of eternity. Plus, is says “THEY” not “she”. ALL can look upon Jesus and be radiant, it is not a purely feminine opportunity. The authors continue in talking about how a woman in love is most beautiful, instructing his to gaze at Jesus to obtain our beauty…in which case men who gaze upon Jesus would be receiving beauty as well, which is distinctively unmasculine.
The very last page of the chapter contains some statements the authors make without any attempt to support them, but simply put forth as if they are truth. The authors write “Unveiling our beauty really just means unveiling our feminine heart. It’s scary, for sure. That is why it is our greatest expression of faith….unveiling our beauty is also our greatest expression of hope..and unveiling our beauty is our greatest expression of love, because it is what the worlds most needs from us.” (147)
I'm not going to personally respond to those outrageous statements, but rather share some verses I found very quickly while searching the Bible for what is written in regards to what faith, hope and love are in God's eyes:
And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. - 2 John 1:6
This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. - 1 John 4:10
In fact, this is love for God: to keep his commands. - 1 John 5:3
Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. - Hebrews 11:1
The woman came and knelt before him. "Lord, help me!" she said. He replied, "It is not right to take the children's bread and toss it to the dogs." "Yes it is, Lord," she said. "Even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their master's table." Then Jesus said to her, "Woman, you have great faith! Your request is granted." And her daughter was healed from that very hour. – Matthew 15:25-28
So Jesus went with them. He was not far from the house when the centurion sent friends to say to him: "Lord, don't trouble yourself, for I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. That is why I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." When Jesus heard this, he was amazed at him, and turning to the crowd following him, he said, "I tell you, I have not found such great faith even in Israel." Then the men who had been sent returned to the house and found the servant well. – Luke 7:6-10
[Notice there is no mention of unveiling beauty in those verses]
The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners…
- Isaiah 61:1
Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless;
maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed.
Rescue the weak and needy;
deliver them from the hand of the wicked.
- Psalm 82:3-4
Learn to do right!
Seek justice,
encourage the oppressed.
Defend the cause of the fatherless,
plead the case of the widow.
- Isaiah 1:17
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